Got Wedding Etiquette?

  One of my many interviews during my decades as principal of Etiquette Now! Author: Lynette Hingle, studioD Guests Lodging Etiquette My Input ...the bride and groom are only required to pay for the wedding party’s lodging. All other invitees will be expected to pay for the cruise themselves. Therefore, it is wise to contact all your invited guests with the dates and available cruise package options as soon as your wedding plans are finalized. Invitations ...there are no etiquette rules concerning verbal invitations, and it is permissible to seek verbal commitments from prospective attendees. You may also want to send save-the-date cards with written travel arrangement itineraries but be aware that proper etiquette insists that an invitation be sent to everyone who has received a save-the-date card. You may also want to put the word out to your wedding guests that they should mail gifts to your home before or after the wedding. While wedding gifts are always apprecia...

  It seems that when a couple decides to marry it is just one joyous party after another until the final bash, better known as the wedding reception.   Scenes from the Wedding Crashers are now dancing in my head.   Sorry for the detour; moving on... Each party comes with its own set of etiquette rules and traditions.   For example, some pre-wedding parties are typically gift-giving events, such as the wedding shower, while the bachelor, bachelorette, and engagement parties are not.   And what about the wedding reception?   What if the couple decides to marry out of state and most close friends and relatives cannot attend?   Is it proper to host a belated reception?   And, if it is proper, how long after a wedding is it appropriate to host a reception?   So many questions. Perhaps a bit of Q & A can guide us toward being better, more polite, guests and hosts, while answering all those pesky questions.   Do I attend my friend'...

It seems that we all have strong feelings about what a wedding should be.   Many feel that it is the most important day of a couple’s life.   Well, it may be the most important day, so far, in a couple’s life.   But it is just another day for everyone else.   Because this is true, we must plan carefully not only focusing on our wedding but also focusing attention on our guests.   After all, we are hosts to our guests. Please Note Parents are no longer financially responsible for their children’s weddings.   This also means that the wedding is no longer a social event for parents.   How to Invite Guests to a Wedding in Vegas With No Reception? Dear Polite One, We will be getting married in Las Vegas and want to send out invitations to a select small group of people, as they have indicated that they would like to come.  This is only for a wedding (no reception).   How do you word this sort of invitation ?  Keep in mind t...

  Consider These Ideas A thrift or hobby shop is a good start. For her wedding , a friend purchased strings of silk red roses (very realistic) from a local hobby shop for a few dollars a bag.  She wound them around the posts of a gazebo leading to the alter.  All cost less than $10. She also found red rose petals to decorate the tables. The venue already has one candle per table. With the pedals, the look was amazing. Two bags total at $1 each. Grocery stores can create special centerpieces for a fraction of the price of a florist. Farmer's markets and local farms may have flowers in bulk at very reasonable prices. Purchase flowers in season. Tap Friends for Ideas. Ehow offers wonderful ideas. Please leave your ideas in the comment section to share with others! More by The Polite One Money-Saving Cake Alternatives Money-Saving Bridal Attire Tips Money-Saving Wedding Favors Tips 

  Wedding favors do not need to be expensive to be cherished by your wedding guests.  Consider these following ideas Thrift or a Hobby Shop: Bargains for the Crafty Ebay, Facebook Marketplace, and Nextdoor Take-Home Boxes of Your Dessert Plant Seeds Tree Saplings Bird Seed Tap Friends for Ideas Ehow offers wonderful ideas to make your own! Please leave your wedding favor ideas in the comment section to share with others! More by The Polite One Money-Saving Officiate Tips Money-Saving Cake Alternatives Money-Saving Bridal Attire Tips 

  Consider These Ideas Yes, I also made my daughter’s wedding cake. Darn those cake decorating classes. Just kidding. I was thrilled to do this for my daughter and fiancé’. It also saved them hundreds. Cupcakes—not as wasteful Faux cake for appearance; serve a delicious sheet cake that guests don't see Selections of deserts.  Pie is popular Cookies Parfaits or ice cream Tap Friends for Ideas Great ideas from Style Me Pretty Visitor Suggestions Buy one small decorative cake to show and serve a different Costco style cake to eat. Please leave your ideas in the comment section to share with others! More by The Polite One Money-Saving Wedding & Reception Tips Wedding Gift Ideas That Won’t Break the Budget Money-Saving Officiate Tips 

  Consider These Ideas Venue Host your wedding and reception at the same venue. Choose a wedding date in a less popular month or on a Sunday. Food Buffets served as food stations are usually less expensive than a sit-down meal and can be very special. A cake and beverage reception is perfect for an event early in the day. Beverages Limit alcohol to beer and wine . Purchase your alcohol in bulk from a discount store. The shorter your event is, the less you will need. Entertainment & Archivists Hire photographer/videographer for the wedding only and ask friends to fill in the gap. Contact the music department of the local high school or college about musicians. Tap Friends for Ideas Visitor Suggestions Buy one small decorative cake to show and serve a different Costco-style cake to eat. Ask a friend to become ordained to marry you.  It's cheaper than paying for one. Please leave your ideas in the comment section to share with others...

  Dear Polite One, I'm another of those living in Seattle who ends up confused and overdressed at almost every turn. Alas, I have a predicament. I was just invited to a wedding reception scheduled to begin at 5:30pm on Friday. It is being held in a nice waterfront restaurant on the Locks, so it's an area where boats dock and sailors and yachters move in and out. Because it is before 6, does the cocktail dress attire still apply? I don't know the hosts and am going as the guest of a local politician, so it feels crucial that I be completely appropriate for his sake (alright, and for my own ego). Adding to the pressure, it is only our second date. I have a fitted black sleeveless dress, slightly below the knee with an empire waist and fuchsia stitched braiding around the edge of the scooped neckline, armholes, and bodice. I was thinking I could tie up a fuchsia cardigan over it to dress it down a little bit if I get there and it's more casual than I expected. ...

  Dear Polite One, I'm attending a formal late afternoon family wedding/reception in the heat of Kentucky.  I understand that the bridal party, including my sister – mother of the bride – will be in formal wear.  She mentioned that the valets will be in black shorts.  Considering the heat, would it be appropriate for my husband and me to wear shorts as well?  We are in our late 50s.  Wearing shorts Dear Wearing Shorts, Given that the bridal party is dressed in formal attire you should too, especially since you are family.  Of course, you don't have to dress as formally as they, but cocktail attire would be most appropriate.  It wouldn't be polite or respectful to wear shorts.  I'm sure you two can find cool cocktail attire that would be appropriate for a wedding.   Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One What to wear to a formal evening wedding in Napa? Do I wear nylons with strappy sandals? ...

  Dear Polite One, I'm attending a 4 pm outdoor wedding/reception in Houston in September.  The dress code is outdoor formal.  I understand that the temperature could be very warm.  Any ideas of how to dress? Sweating in Houston Dear Sweating in Houston, Typically, outdoor weddings are informal and fold in the fabricated dress code, and this is a mystery.   So, we will have to make some assumptions.  Since it is an evening wedding, it could be a slight bit more formal, so perhaps wearing what you would to a very nice restaurant would be best.  If this is held at a more formal venue, include high-quality accessories.  Additionally, be careful about choosing revealing attire just because of the heat.  Guests shouldn't vie for the eye.  Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One How to Dress for Formal Wedding in New York ? What to wear to a formal evening wedding in Napa? Do I wear nylons with strappy s...

    Dear Polite One, May we, the groom's family, send thank you notes to guests that attended my son's wedding reception? These are our family friends, and we are just so pleased people came from all over to help them celebrate the marriage of our son.  The bride and groom hosted the event, so I want to make sure it doesn't appear that we paid so wording is a concern.   Can you please provide some advice and if this is appropriate?   MOG Dear MOG, Actually, no.  It might appear as if it is a reminder to the guest to send a gift .  If the guest gave a gift, the couple would send a thank you note mentioning their appreciation for the guest's attendance.   Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One How to list all the parents on the wedding program? How to list divorced parents on the wedding program? How to list bride’s escorts on the wedding program?

Dear Polite One, I need to inform my guests that they will have to send checks to my account or pay the restaurant directly for their reception meal.  How do I do this? Dear Visitor, Sorry but this is never done.  It is impolite way to ask guests to provide the party.  Hosts provide the entire party, especially when the party is a wedding reception. You are essentially asking guests to pay for your reception.  It would be best to host the party you can afford to host. This is what we do when we invite. Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One Should we attend a wedding for a couple we don’t know? How to write my seating cards? How to Address a Congratulations Card for Doctors?

  Hello Polite One, I will like some advice on how to go about writing the seating cards for the wedding reception.  If it’s a family, do I write Mr. & Mrs. Smith & family or just Mr. & Mrs. Smith.  If it is a single person with a guest, is it written as Mr. Smith and Guest or just Mr. Smith.  Also do I include the husband's first names, like Mr. & Mrs. John Smith (I know the first names must be included for the same last name multiple times), or do I just leave it as Mr. & Mrs. Smith .  I hope my email is not confusing and looking forward to hear from you. Confused Dear Confused, Your email is not confusing at all.  For the family, you would list them as a family: Mr. & Mrs. Smith & family.  The same applies to your guest with an escort.  It is your choice to use first names.  But if you have many people with the same last name you may want to include the husband’s name.  If this is an inf...

  Dear Polite One, My daughter is getting married and wondered if it is improper to open gifts at the reception anymore, as we have a reception hall for 5 hours?  Some suggest that since they are leaving on a cruise the next day, they should go through the cards to collect the cash to spend on the honeymoon. MOB Dear MOB, Yikes!  How awkward and potentially embarrassing for guests who do not give cash.  Plus, it is on display to all that the couple may value cash over guests.  Not polite.  It is not appropriate to open gifts at the reception, as they are supposed to be shipped to the couple before the wedding.  It is also never appropriate to go through the gifts, including cards at the reception.  Cards may be given to the best man to hold on to until after the reception.  This is very common and logical as those cards could be lost. The couple would need to know who gave what.  They should also not expec...