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What to wear to an engagement party in a Napa Valley vineyard?

cocktail attire; woman in dress; white woman 

Dear Polite One,

What would be appropriate attire for a Napa Valley engagement cocktail party in a vineyard?  Also, am I expected to give a gift?

Thank you,

Curious

Dear Curious,

Napa tends to be classy casual, which basically means high-quality casual clothing.  Since this is a cocktail party that is also an engagement party, I suggest kicking it up a notch with the little black dress/cocktail attire. 

In the past, an engagement party was a surprise party for guests to inform them of the couple's engagement.  Because of this, even today, only very close family are expected to give gifts.  They shouldn't bring them to the party. Gifts are supposed to be shipped to the bride, as they are considered hers. 

The unfortunate gray area here is that many do not know what is considered proper.  So, some may bring gifts, but you shouldn't feel embarrassed if you don't. 

Sincerely,

The Polite One

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