Serial Weddings for the Same Couple is Not Polite...or nice
“What’s the point?” Vicky asks her fiancé when he suggests they marry privately in Barcelona and follow up with a formal affair back home. Of course, in this movie, Vicky Cristina Barcelona, the reason for her question was a reluctance to say, “I do.” But it is a valid question for all of us, as it isn’t logical and from an etiquette viewpoint is as improper as one can get.
However,
with so many celebrity couples opting for multiple wedding ceremonies – to the
same people – the average person might assume that this practice is now, not
only the “popular” new expression of love but appropriate, which it is
neither. Basically, it is most impolite
to guests who might consider this a real wedding and feel the need to
give a gift. This often results in
guests, even family, viewing this as a blatant grab since a wedding is a gift-giving
event and the vow renewal is not.
For
those of us who offer professional etiquette advice, this behavior makes it
difficult. Day after day emails stream
in asking questions related to the “second” wedding ceremony: “Is it a vow
renewal, or is it a wedding?”
Obviously, it can’t be a wedding if the couple is already married, because really, how can a wife really be a bride? And what could a newly married couple have to renew?
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Craziness
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