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Wedding Correspondence Q & A: Including Registry Info?

Including registry information inside wedding invitation

If couples care what their guests think, the number one wedding invitation rule is: never ever include gift registry information!

Additionally, we never list gifts on invitations, even if we don’t want any.  Requesting cash, in any manner?  Yikes!  This just may be the talk of the next few years.  It’s typically viewed as clueless and crass.   

We may convey this message through word of mouth or on a wedding website, but never on the first page. 

How to include registry info in the announcement? 

Dear Polite One,

My fiancé and I are planning a destination wedding to an all-inclusive resort in Jamaica to save money.  We are only inviting immediate family and a couple of our closest friends.  Since we are planning this wedding on a shoestring budget and we don't need anything else since we've lived together for many years, we have registered for our wedding/honeymoon.  

I want to send announcements of our wedding/reception to those not invited to let them know where we are registered. After all, we have given them all gifts for their life events.  And this should be a lot cheaper for everyone since there won't be a shower, so they only have to provide one gift.  We are out so much money and shouldn't miss out just because we're not hosting a traditional wedding.

Wants gifts 

Dear Wants gifts, 

Please do not do this as it is not appropriate or polite.  Announcements announce a wedding that has already taken place.  Gift information or registries are never included.  Gifts are not expected from those not invited even if you have given to these people in the past.  A gift is something people give because they want to.  If someone asks, you may inform them of your registry.  This includes those invited to your wedding.  After all, registry information is not included with invitations either.   

Many find these types of registries as presumptuous, as you two are expected to pay for all elements of your wedding/reception/honeymoon.  So, please do not be upset if no one contributes.  One huge issue here is that gifts are given for the wedding, not the reception or honeymoon.  This announcement might be viewed as greedy and insulting like “None of you are important enough to invite to my wedding, but I want you to pay for it.”   

Sincerely,

The Polite One

Please Read

Wedding Complications Q & A: Ignoring Groom's Parents

Nix Embarrassing Speeches & Rings All Around

Rules: thank you notes, sympathy letters, wedding enclosures...

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