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Is Mother of the Groom Obligated to Attend Out-of-Town Shower?

 gift; wrapped gift; wedding gift

Dear Polite One,

I am the mother of a groom.  The bride's shower is out of town. 

Is it required that I attend?  It's expensive to fly, so I would, of course, send a proper gift.  I'm happy to be included and don't want to offend the bride by not going. 

She and her mother said they would love to have me attend, but they would understand if I could not.  We will be flying our entire family out of town for the wedding in a matter of 8 weeks.  I would also have to travel by myself since no other family members can attend.

Can you offer some proper etiquette for me to follow?

Thank you!

Nan

Dear Nan,

No problem.  This is an easy one. 

When from out of town, it is not necessary to attend.  A gift isn't even necessary if not attending.  Still, parents are expected to send gifts.   This isn't something I agree with, but it is still an expectation many people have these days.  So, it's probably better to send one. 

Most sincerely,

The Polite One

More by The Polite One

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