How to plan a vow renewal for our 10th anniversary?

Dear Polite One,

It will soon be our 10-year anniversary and we would like to celebrate with a renewal of our vows since we were married in a very small civil ceremony. We would like to include our two children ages 5 and 8. It would be a simple afternoon ceremony with a small cake and punch reception. Afterward, we will take a cruise.

What does the ceremony consist of? What is the proper attire? Suit? What type of cake? Could it be a wedding cake?

How close to a wedding ceremony could it be and still appear polite?

Lucky Husband

Dear Lucky Husband,

Your celebration should be very nice since you are planning it as a simple anniversary party. Involving your children is very positive.

Both of you should dress for the formality of the event. You could wear a suit, but a sport coat and slacks would be better. Your wife can dress in a daytime version of a cocktail dress that does not resemble a wedding dress. Your children could stand with you, participate in a candle lighting, or escort your wife to you. There are many activities they can participate in, but those are the top three.

Your cake should be more of an anniversary cake, which could include writing. Sometimes couples will have a replica of their wedding cake, which is fine.

The ceremony is not a legal event, and many times is a blessing of the church. So, it can be any type of ceremony you wish. It is just best not to completely mirror a wedding, so avoid the wedding march. Please no attendants, besides your children.

You can write your vows, or if you have chosen to have your marriage blessed by the church, ask what the officiate suggests. Because this is not a legal ceremony, you could have anyone facilitate it.

Sincerely,

The Polite One

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