Skip to main content

Anti-Clueless Advice: Wedding Guest Attire Decoded

unbelievable; covering eyes; man 

In the movie "You Again," Jamie Lee Curtis and Sigourney Weaver — as mothers of bride and groom – both wore red, off-the-shoulder dresses to the rehearsal dinner.  Yikes!  All eyes traveled to the attractive red dots floating around the room. 

This, of course, isn't the best attire for mothers to wear to any wedding-related event.  But, what about wedding guests?  What is proper attire for wedding guests to wear to the wedding and how is it determined?

Pay Attention to the Details

The wedding invitation is our first clue to the formality of the wedding, and thus to our attire.  The heaviness of the paper, time of day, and the type of venue give us hints.  Usually, daytime weddings are less formal.  Couples use heavier paper for invitations for formal weddings.  Most often they will include the wording, "Formal" or "Black Tie" in the lower left-hand corner.   And, if the venue seems formal, the wedding usually is as well.  Of course, there's nothing wrong with asking the couple what their dress code expectations are. 

Dos

  • Pay attention to the dress code and dress accordingly.
  • Attention to hygiene!
  • Both genders should choose high-quality accessories, especially for formal events.

Women:

  • Dress to impress, but not to draw the eye—quality attire and not too revealing.
  • May now wear black, as it is no longer taboo.
  • Wear understated makeup and style your hair.
  • Take gloves off to eat or drink.  

Men:

  • Shave.
  • When in doubt of formality, wear a dark suit for evening weddings.

Be careful experimenting with the tuxedo. The classic black tux, white shirt, and black bow tie is a perfect choice.  If the invitation uses an odd word when requesting formal attire (ex: creative formal), it might be best, and less embarrassing, to go with a tux paired with a trendy black shirt with no tie. Consider the venue, region, and couple when making these choices.

Don'ts

Ladies:

  • Wear all white, red, or any other bright color, unless a part of the culture.
  • Wear sequins during the day.
  • Show off the sisters.  A wedding really isn't the best place to bare too much flesh.
  • Wear nylons with open-toed shoes. 
  • Wear opera-length gloves with gowns with sleeves.

Men:

  • Wear a tux during the daytime.
  • Wear jeans, shorts, or beachwear unless instructed to do so.

More by The Polite One

Is a 30th-anniversary vow renewal in Hawaii proper?

Wedding renewal after a long separation?

Which Color is or is not Taboo for Wedding Attire?

Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

4 of the Most Asked Wedding Etiquette Questions Answered

After decades of answering etiquette questions, especially about weddings, I’d like to share a few of those questions that represent the majority of concerns.   Q: Is an invited coworker obligated to spend a certain amount? I'm going to both the wedding shower and the wedding. Should I buy both gifts off the registry? A: Unfortunately, yes. This is one of the biggest reasons I feel that the gift-less wedding shower is the smartest route for us to follow today.  Why should the couple receive more than one gift per guest?  It just doesn't make any sense and isn't fair to guests. Q : Registries feel so impersonal.   Is there any way to make it more personal? A: I honestly can't think of any way to make a registry more personal.  If a couple decides to register, they should choose items from the low end of the price range as well as the bigger ticket items, so the list doesn't appear to be a greed-fest.  Unfortunately, it can have th...
Post a Comment
Read more

When and Where to Seat and Sit

Playing Musical Chairs With Parents Dear Polite One,   On the day of the wedding when it becomes time to seat the parents of the bride and groom, who sits first and last especially when dealing with stepparents? Me First Dear Me First , We have more parental issues to deal with these days than we did in the past.    In fact, more weddings are encore wedding than first, which reflects this trend.  So, to keep everyone happy and separate, we seat parents in this order:  Groom’s father and stepmother (third row); Bride’s father and stepmother (third row); Groom’s mother and stepfather (first row); Bride’s mother and stepfather (first row).   If everyone is on friendly terms, all parents may sit in the front row in the given order.  The stepparents follow the person escorting parents to their seats.   Sincerely, The Polite One Seating Chart Dilemma Dear Polite One,   I'm working ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Do I wear nylons with strappy sandals for a fall evening wedding?

  Dear Polite One, From what I have read on your site, I should wear a cocktail (little black dress or equivalent) to a fall evening wedding at a golf country club.  Do, I need to wear nylons with my strappy sandals? Wedding Newbie in Wisconsin Dear Wedding Newbie in Wisconsin, Bravo on doing your attire homework!  You are absolutely correct about your attire choice.  Nylons aren't nearly as popular or expected due to our love of sandals. Strappy sandals look splendid with nice dresses, even in the winter.  FYI: It is a faux pas to wear nylons with open-toed shoes. Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One How to dress for a wedding as "the second wife"? How to Dress for Formal Wedding in New York ? What to wear to a formal evening wedding in Napa?
Post a Comment
Read more