Anti-Clueless Advice: 3 Most Asked Wedding Etiquette Questions Answered

Interviews With an Etiquette Consultant

Wedding season can mean excitement and anxiety for brides, grooms, and their families. Since I’m an etiquette consultant, those mixed feelings typically result in an overflowing inbox of questions from all sides. Typically, intense interest in a particular subject is newsworthy, which makes it a perfect topic for morning news segments. This was the case recently as I visited two of our local stations to offer expert Wedding Etiquette 101 advice.

The Q and A Session

This interview was a typical straightforward question and answer segment with three of my most asked questions. (Video)

Question:

How do couples inform guests of their wedding website?

Answer:

There can be a link on the “Save the Date” or newspaper announcement. Still, it should never be listed on wedding invitations, as these sites typically have gift registry information. Speaking of gifts, registry information shouldn’t be listed on the first page of your wedding website. However, a link to a registry page at the top or bottom of the front page is perfectly acceptable.

Question:

As a guest, how do I know what to wear to a wedding?

Answer:

Play detective. Discern the formality of the venue and time of day. The paper used for the invitation may offer clues as well. A formal wedding is typically indicated by using heavier paper and engraved printing for the invitation. If after considering these hints you are still confused, call the bridal couple for help.

Question:

Must I purchase a gift from a couple’s registry?

Answer:

No. Gift a gift from your heart, something that reflects your relationship with the couple.

Next: Interview Two

Please Read

Wedding Invitations: Email, Response Card, Guest Issues

Nix Embarrassing Speeches & Rings All Around

Wedding Correspondence Q & A: Including Registry Info?

Comments

Bride Doesn’t Wants Alcohol or Dances at Reception

Dear Polite One, I've always dreamt that my wedding reception would be alcohol and dance-free - except for the first dance of the bride and groom. When running the idea past a few people they seemed shocked that I've taken out both of these elements and are making me doubt my idea . The wedding will be in the evening, and then dinner. Is there a steadfast rule that there must be alcohol and dance at a wedding? Isn't a nice dinner enough? And what things could be added to make it fun for the guests? Thank you, Visitor from Yorkton Saskatchewan Dear Yorkton Saskatchewan, People typically expect alcohol with their dinner at evening wedding receptions . So, it would probably be better if this were held earlier in the day. Dancing isn’t that important. However, it is better to skip all dances, rather than just the one dance with you. That may seem awkward. The only hard and fast rule is that we, as hosts, offer our guests wha...

Do I wear nylons with strappy sandals for a fall evening wedding?

Dear Polite One, From what I have read on your site, I should wear a cocktail (little black dress or equivalent) to a fall evening wedding at a golf country club. Do, I need to wear nylons with my strappy sandals? Wedding Newbie in Wisconsin Dear Wedding Newbie in Wisconsin, Bravo on doing your attire homework! You are absolutely correct about your attire choice. Nylons aren't nearly as popular or expected due to our love of sandals. Strappy sandals look splendid with nice dresses, even in the winter. FYI: It is a faux pas to wear nylons with open-toed shoes. Sincerely, The Polite One More by The Polite One How to dress for a wedding as "the second wife"? How to Dress for Formal Wedding in New York ? What to wear to a formal evening wedding in Napa?

Anti-Clueless Advice: What to Wear and What Gifts to Give

How to Decode the Dress Code and to Give the Right Gift Many questions I receive as an etiquette consultant are from wedding guests. Guests are especially concerned with what they should wear and what they should give as gifts . All who contact me are deeply worried about committing any type of faux pas, as many weddings tend to be surrounded by drama these days. For example, one guest shared that the bride called fuming that the gift she shipped to the bride's home was inadequate, so she returned it to the store for cash—true story. With crazy, hurtful behavior like that, it is no wonder wedding guests are apprehensive about wedding guest protocol. How do we know what to wear to a wedding? Wedding invitations are supposed to help guests understand the formality of a wedding. Often, this is not the case. Here is a real-life example: a guest received an invitation of heavy-weight paper indicating a formal wedding, but the location listed was a...

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