Who
receives gifts from the bridal couple?
Dear
Polite One,
I
know the bride and groom are supposed to give gifts to their parents and
wedding attendants, is anyone else on that gift list? What
about Grandparents and other family members?
Gifting
Dear
Gifting,
The
only gifts that are obligatory are those to the attendants. A parental gift is optional.
What is the proper age of a flower girl, junior bridesmaid
and ring child?
Dear
Polite One,
What's
the appropriate age range between a flower girl and a Junior Bridesmaid?
Girly
Issues
Dear
Girly Issues,
The
flower and ring child should be between the ages of four to eight.
Junior attendants should be between the ages of nine to fourteen.
Sincerely,
The
Polite One
Is a 30-year-old too old to be a flower girl?
Dear
Polite One,
My
question may sound slightly odd but here it goes. I’m 30 and have a friend since early
childhood of the same age. One of my
most cherished memories is sitting around talking about wanting to be a flower
girl which neither of us had the opportunity.
Now
I’m getting married soon and would like my friend to be my flower girl. I realize it isn’t typical. But she and my mother think it’s sweet. My fiancé has no opinion and just wants me to
be happy. Do you think it’s crazy? I don’t want to embarrass anyone.
Best,
Hopeful
Dear
Hopeful,
I’ll
play mirror here. In your first
sentence, you admit your idea may sound odd.
Truly, it is the first time I’ve heard of an adult flower girl, so there
is that. Some guests just may giggle and
that might embarrass your friend. Then
again, I suppose if your reasoning for including her was mentioned in your
program, the giggles might very well turn into “ahs”.
There
is no 'rule' against it. It is just one of those expectations that the flower
girl will be of a certain age. Because of our lifestyles rules and traditions
change daily. A MOH is no longer gender-specific and anyone can escort the
bride down the aisle. This is your
choice and perhaps everyone will react positively. But be forewarned that they
may not.
Sincerely,
The
Polite One
Soloist in the same attire as the bridesmaids?
Dear
Polite One,
Is it appropriate to ask our soloist to wear attire the same or similar as the
bridesmaids? May she march in the procession with the wedding party?
Friend
of Soloist
Dear
Friend of Soloist,
Even
though this isn't typical, it isn't a breach of etiquette. So, if this is what
you would like and she is willing, go for it. I think it will appear
charming.
Sincerely,
The
Polite One
Mother of the Groom Attire
Dear
Polite One,
My son is getting married in September and I am not sure of what color to wear.
The bridesmaids' dress is a two-piece dress: the top is black, the bottom red. Additionally,
what is the proper etiquette for my financial responsibilities? Thanks so much for
your help!
Two-Part
Question
Dear
Two-Part Question,
Traditionally the
bride's parents are responsible for the major portion of the wedding expenses
with the groom's parents responsible for the officiate, flowers,
transportation, the rehearsal dinner, various expenses for the reception, and
the honeymoon. However, fewer are following those old, tired rules.
Couples
typically pay for their own weddings or the costs are split so everyone can
help the couple in the best way possible. More couples can pay for their
own weddings these days and really should. No longer does the bride live
at home taken care of by her father until the day she marries someone who can
then take care of her. Women take care of themselves—they should pay too.
Because
the bridesmaid's dresses are red and black, you could wear a dress or evening
pantsuit with those colors in it. You should first ask the mother of the
bride what she plans on wearing though. She is to choose first and you
then coordinate your outfit according to hers.
Sincerely,
The Polite One
Please
Read
Anti-Clueless
Advice: How to Plan a Wedding That Doesn't Insult Guests
Wedding Guest
Attire Advice: Decoding the Dress Code
Nix Embarrassing
Speeches & Rings All Around
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